Retirement blues to opportunities

X’s work recently ended.
He’s 60+.
Some health issues.
The change in daily routine is a challenge. 

Recognize this situation – for yourself or others in your life?

Does it resonate…?

Follow along with us on a journey of discovery, to gain insight into a way forward…

I asked:   What feelings are associated with this state?

Reply:  Anxiety

Me:  What’s the anxiety about?

Reply: 

  • Too much choice 
  • Unfamiliarity with the amount of choices 
  • Too little structure in a day / my life 
  • Needing a strategy to function in such a wide open situation

 I don’t know what to do.
A job has structure for a day – time is mapped out.
It is sorted for me and I don’t have to work it out.
What I do at work is clear – there are things I am expected to do so I do them.

Now those aren’t present, I have to choose what to spend my time on.
How do I choose?  
What guide-lines do I use now?
The routines and habits I used to use aren’t relevant now.

Me:  Small experiments can give big insight. If you try something once, just a taste, then you can answer: “Would I like to do more of this – yes/no?”

Reply:  You mean, try something out and if I like it, keep going?
If I don’t like it much, then go try something else?

Me:  Yes!  If you try lots of little experiments, you can get lots of information from which to make choices.

  • Take for example, activities you have  done on weekends/evenings – because you enjoy them. What would you like to do more of?
  • What did you love doing as a child which you gave up as you ‘grew up’ – and it still draws you? How could you try it out again now? 
  • What groups might have ‘like-minded’ people – doing what you like too?  Which groups could you visit ONCE to see if you enjoy them so much you want to repeat? 
  • What other experiments could you try, to find activities which you find fulfilling?

Out of these possibilities, what is one small experiment, that attracts you to start with first?

Reply: I want to find ways to share with others in a meaningful way. I’ve wondered about a couple of community groups so now might be time to visit them. 

Me:  Great. What first, small steps can you take towards that?

Reply: I’ll find out when they meet next and where.

Me:  Goodo! Let’s record these ideas so you can come back and check them out another time later.

Together, we created an ‘Insight Sheet’ from these questions, of small steps he could follow.
And it gave ideas he thought he’d explore.

Aim: to gain information about what he does want to do, when and how he chooses. 

Me:  Let’s check back in: compared with how you felt at the start [anxiety], how might you describe what you feel now?

Reply:  Relief?

Take-away message:

At times of change in life, small experiments with new ways, ideas, or methods can give great insight and rewards.

insight-sheet-pik-sun-on-blue-sky

Like your own ‘Insight Sheet’ to give you more clarity on a better path, more in tune with ‘YOU’?  Get your copy now. [Its free and my gift to you]

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Next post, we’ll look at ‘Should’, ‘Could’ and how we can gain choice once more.

To you and your flourishing life – whatever stage of life you are exploring right now!

cheers
Heather

[This in no way offers medical advice. Please, please follow advice of appropriate medical/health professionals. This exploration purely provides insights into choices for daily life]

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